It's hard to believe, but I have been a Californian for a year now. A year ago today I pulled my car up to my new apartment after a week of driving across America. I left my mother, grandmother and Joey in Miamisburg, Ohio and for four days made my way across Interstate 70 to the great state of California. It was an exhilarating experience, one I had been waiting on for so long. I wanted so much after graduation to go some place new and different. Fulfilling that goal was a terrific rush.

A year later, I'm still in the Valley. My apartment is so much more than just the exhumed contents of my packed car and the futon I assembled on my first night in my new apartment. I am so much more than that green, young copy editor from Georgia. I have accomplished so much since I've arrived here.

In just one year, I have bought furniture and things for my apartment, trained and completed a marathon, climbed the tallest mountain in the state and even fulfilled my promise to my good friend Nicole and made it all the way to France. I'm so thankful for the opportunities afforded to my since I got my job. I feel I have purpose and direction which a year ago were things I desperately sought. My life here is invigorating and I look forward to what the next year has to offer.

A year from now, I hope things will be very different. My goal is to apply to graduate school in the fall with an assistantship at a school in California or hopefully in Washington D.C. or New York (two places I have dreamed to have lived). Before I do that, though, I hope to achieve more in New Media at my newspaper. On the Saturday after Thanksgiving, I will begin training for my next marathon, the Georgia Marathon on March 25 in Atlanta, Ga., which I will be running with my friend Marilia. I am also ironing out the details of a trip to Las Vegas with my friend Jeremy to see our fabulous friend Padmini and visit the hallowed landmark The Cheetah, where they filmed the film classic "Showgirls." I'm going back to Ohio early this January to see my mother and grandmother. I may also be going to see Jeremy in Ann Arbor, Mich., next year.

Apologies, setting goals like this keeps me motivated and keeps things interesting. Like I said, I accomplished so much this last year, and if I hadn't laid out so much I probably would have just wasted away in the boring Central Valley.

Well, before I go, I thought it might be interesting to share my iTunes Top 25 Most Played playlist over the past year. Here it is:

Top 25 Most Played on my iPod

1. garbage - Run Baby Run
2. Amuro Namie - Come
3. Relient K - Who I Am Hates Who I've Been
4. Day by Day - Itazura Na Kiss
5. garbage - Happy Home
6. The Cure - Push
7. New Order - Turn
8. New Order - Regret
9. The Smiths - Some Girls Are Bigger Than Others
10. The Cure - Just Like Heaven
11. New Order - True Faith
12. Relient K - More Than Useless
13. New Order - Bizarre Love Triangle
14. Relient K - Be My Escape
15. Madonna - Forbidden Love
16. The All-American Rejects - Dirty Little Secret
17. Ayumi Hamasaki - Dearest
18. The Cure - Friday I'm In Love
19. Kelly Clarkson - Since U Been Gone
20. The Killers - Smile Like You Mean It
21. The Flaming Lips - The Wand
22. Nada Surf - Inside of Love
23. Tears For Fears - Head Over Heals / Broken [Live]
24. The Smiths - This Charming Man
25. garbage - Cup of Coffee

And, just for reminiscence sake, check out my letters from last year. I chronicled my whole trip from Ohio to California, reflecting on my three months with my mother as well as reflecting on my experience in Visalia a month after I had arrived. It's pretty sweet, check it out.

Sorry about that stupid idiotic thing I posted last night. My grandfather did pass away yesterday and it was very troubling, but I should point out I am at peace about it. I'm am doing just fine (I had just a bit too much wine and I watched a depressing episode of Buffy).

By the grace of God, I actually spoke to him yesterday. I hadn't spoken to him since I visited in May this year. I told him about my marathon that I ran in June and also my grueling hike up Mt. Whitney in August. He used to live in California so he was aware of the mountain. I told him I loved him and that I would be coming back to Georgia in March to run the Georgia Marathon and I was looking forward to seeing him. That's not going to happen but I find I cannot feel bad about it. It's incredible that I spoke to him the day he died and I was able to make peace with him and tell him that I loved him. It's truly incredible.

I'm in Reno this week and I will post some pictures later. I had a bad sinus headache coming over the Sierra today. My coworkers made fun of my ravings for veggie dogs (don't ask why the subject of my vegetarianism came up in conversation, it always seems to be a hot topic). Tomorrow is going to be a long day and I may do some gambling tomorrow evening. I won't win anything, but what the hey, I can try.

Thanks for your kind words, I'm doing just fine. I loved my grandfather, but he is in a better place. I may be going to his funeral at Arlington Cemetery, so maybe I will reflect on him then. Right now, I am just still absorbing it. But I'm doing just fine (I just need to stay away from my computer as well as my cell phone if I decide to have a lot of wine again).

Good night (what did people think of my France pictures?? They are here, go see them!)

Today was a rough day. My grandfather died today. I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. I'm sorry I haven't posted links to my complete Web site. I'm bad. It's been bad.

Some of the France posts are up. I have pictures here. I'm sorry, but this week is kind of complicated. It's been kind of rough. I had a lot of wine tonight because, I don't know. I've been watching "The Body," an episode of Buffy. It's sad.

I'm going to Reno tomorrow probably. I'm not sure what to think about it. Leave me a message, that would be nice.

Anyways, I have to think of something else, like sleep or running. I like to sleep and run.

Good-night.

Lately I have been sort of burned out on Netflix. Instead of hastily watching a movie when I come home and hurriedly taking it to the mailbox the next day, I sort of carelessly hold onto my movies and return them whenever I feel up to it. I suppose that's the way it should be, but to at least liven up my desire to watch engaging film, I have been putting some of my most favorite movies on my queue — movies I sadly do not own, at least not now.

Today I watched Un long dimanche de fiançailles, A French film from one of my most favorite directors, Jean-Pierre Jeunet, who also directed possibly my most favorite film, Le fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain. Unlike Amélie, Un long dimanche de fiançailles (Or A Very Long Engagement as it is known to American audiences) is much more somber and serious. It is set in France following World War I.

The movie begins following the war, in which Mathilde holds hopelessly onto her belief that her fiancé, Manech, somehow survived his death sentence for self-mutilation, though he has not returned home for almost three years. Mathilde hires a private detective and enlists her family and friends to find out all they can about the circumstances of Manech's death outside of the trench curiously named Bingo Crépuscule.

Manech, having been shot in the hand, is accused of self-mutilation in hopes to return home to Mathilde. Along with four other men who have committed similar acts, Manech and the others are sent over the trench to fend for themselves in no man's land, effectively ensuring their demise. They survive longer than most but according to military reports, they were all found dead. However, Mathilde uncovers stories that seem to suggest a man wearing German boots made it out with another wounded soldier. She holds onto the very slim hope that her Manech is that hurt man.

The movie is very difficult to understand, even with subtitles. I watched it for the first time a year ago when I was living with my mother and grandmother in Ohio. I could hardly understand how the story weaved through the tales of the five men sent into no man's land, but I followed pretty well this time around. It's important to pay close attention to the details of the men's lives and most especially their names. It's always more difficult for me to remember a French name than a traditional American one, so that's probably why I have more trouble.

I won't say much more about the film. All I can say is that no other film I have ever watched has made me cry, except this one. Even a year later, knowing the conclusion of the film, I can't help but cry. It's exhilarating to watch a film that has such an effect on me. I hope that someone else somewhere might feel the same way.

As far as the France stuff, I swear it will be done soon. I just got my photos off of my phone so I should be putting everything together soon. The entries are done I just need to edit them. Blah blah...plus I have a lot of cleaning to do today, so I better get to work. It's sure to be the next thing I post.